Chapter 21: The Way of the Siddhars
Living harmoniously with the nature.
Translation
Let siddhars appear on seeing
you
If you come seeking and ask
for a reason
Anchor sincerely, using your
mind
If you ask for the boon you want,
they will grant it
Like honey they will get you
married, and
To become strong, will also show
you where the fusion of suryakalai and chandrakalai dwell, and
Will also make you become great,
for me
Totally, five women, are my
wives
Each of those women had
Exceptional brave men as their
sons, see
For that Bogar, wives and
sons,
Were many, in this world, for
Agastiyar too,
Living like this, along with
grandsons and
Is the nature of all the 18
siddhars
—Siddhar Korakkar “Namanasa
Thiravukol” Songs (21–22)
Death and birth are inherent part of any life cycle, the rise of one over another will shift the ecological balance; aggravate the causes pertaining to emotional, mental and physical agonies; upset the smooth natural flow of the events; disrupt the very naturally existing harmony, if the situation continues to persist, earth will be mercilessly mutilated; further distorted by the sheer imbalance, enforced by man-made concepts, beliefs, deeds and justifications, even the laws formed to prevent disharmony in all forms and nature, will in turn, come up with, unexpected chaos at every unexpected turn, they will be breached, scrutinized and barred, knowingly and intentionally, for the rich causes created by the same men; great ideologies formed by them; hard and fast rules enforced by their iron fists; solely attributed to spiritual, scientific, and social developments, are in truth, mere expressions of their physical urges, psychological dominance, and emotional imbalance, they are fooled to believe, that they have made, and they are making big sacrifices that are much bigger than their personal selves, which infact is a big, fat lie; a walking curse, on the naturally prevailing ecological balance, similar to digging graves for others in which they themselves will be buried, sooner or later. Death over birth, or birth over death doesn’t signify the elimination of one over another, whereas if the scenario is death and not birth or birth and not death, it will not only lead to total chaos, but a full-fledged extinction, either it would eliminate a species or eliminate all other species. Any human intervention, hampering the natural cycles, would unquestionably lead to a total devastation, even mild adjustment could prove to be painfully disastrous, if not handled with utmost care and most importantly, much needed, parameter of all, ‘The Common Sense’, else, the earth is doomed to exterminate its most valuable species, ‘The Homo Sapiens’.
Once the duo had left the scene, Macham’s attention fell on Balaraman and Muthupandian, he inquired them,
“How did it go? Have you found the right spot, for erecting a temple?”
Muthupandian replied,
“We have identified three good spots, but we would like you to make the final decision, point us the best one.”
Macham smiled at them and said,
“What will this old man do out there, you people know better, in case, if I choose something other than what you have selected, will you not be angry with me?”
Muthupandian hesitated a bit, said,
“No Master, we would rather be happy.”
Macham nodded, let out a short sigh, looked up at the stars, lost himself in deep thoughts, for a few moments he remained silent, then he looked at Balaraman and spoke earnestly,
“There is something you need to know further, a solemn act would remove the final discrimination that is still blinding your wisdom, pushing you to make biased views.”
Then he turned towards Sarutha and said,
“Let us spend a few nights outdoors, in the wilderness, day and night, one with nature, don’t make us any food, don’t come for any assistance, and most, don’t expect us to come at least for a day or two. Once I am back, I will leave for Vasimuni hills.”
Then he looked at the gleeful face of Adhavan, for he was almost up on his feet, ready for the exploration, desperate for spending time in the raw untamed wilderness, Macham patted his shoulders and said aloud,
“Let us make it more interesting and educative, let us go in there, just like that, without any preparation, face boldly, the real time situations that we come across, as a measure of precaution, Muthupandian alone can carry a spear and a burning torch, nothing more.”
Balaraman was obviously surprised at the audacity they both had, especially that of Macham’s, irrespective of his age and the wisdom he possessed; the unsurpassable spiritual powers he was bestowed with; the high position he held in the society that even kings bow to, his willingness to opt for such an adventure, apt only for kids, was really intriguing and incomprehensive, he knew well, not to interfere in the ways of the siddhars, continuing to admire the inherent quality in him, he eagerly joined the party.
Mathivathani came out with a burning torch, handed it over to Muthupandian, Kayalvizi gave Balaraman a flask filled with the oil, the party was up on their feet, ready to leave, Sarutha interrupted and asked Macham,
“Won’t you have supper tonight?”
Macham replied,
“Mother nature will send us food when we are hungry, she will feed us from now on, we will eat whatever she sends us across.”
Then he looked at Muthupandian and said,
“Please take us to the first spot.”
Ever gentle disposition of Balaraman tightened a bit, it lost its serenity, a mild trouble lingered in his mind, it was clearly visible in his pale, withdrawn face, still, he accompanied them, they walked together, close to one another. Muthupandian led the front, with the burning torch in his left hand and a long spear in his right, he walked sure-footed, straight into the wilderness, Macham followed him, along with Adhavan by his right and Balaraman to his left, they walked together in silence, leaving the womenfolk rest at home, undisturbed by the unending expectations of the men, without whom, the whole place will look empty and uninhabited, slowly, the foursome merged with the darkness, even the faint light of the torch was swallowed by the silent night.
After an hour’s walk, they reached the first spot, it had a beautiful moonlit pond, encircled by boulders all around, the natural formation was almost a simple replica of a royal fort, as though, erected for guarding the purity of the pristine clear pond. Adhavan looked into the pond, saw his own reflection and that of the waning moon. Balaraman stood beside him in silence, with an inner turmoil brewing deep inside him, contemplating over the words said by Siddhar Macham. Leaving them unattended, Macham swiftly climbed up the boulders, Muthupandian followed him, they studied the vast expanse thoroughly, when they jointly climbed down the boulders, Macham said to Muthupandian,
“Let us spend the night here, alone and aloof, under the immense presence of mother nature.”
Then they wandered around with Adhavan and Balaraman, collected a handful of firewood; found an open spot nearby the pond; heaped all the firewood at the center; sat around it; stretched their legs and arms; eased their mind, body and soul, allowing the softness of the night, infuse their blessed souls, slowly, as the cold wind caressed their warm bodies, Muthupandian gave the torch to Macham, requested him to light the firewood, he did as requested, the camp was lit, the golden light encompassed all the four. The silence mixed well with the campfire, silent cool night, and the wild environment, it was hard for anyone to bring up a topic for the night’s discussion as their minds were busy pondering over their personal miseries, Adhavan broke the engulfing silence, asked Macham straight,
“Can I bathe in this pond?”
Macham said,
“Yes, please go ahead.”
Muthupandian said,
“Let me also join him.”
They both walked towards the pond, as they came close to the edge, Adhavan unable to contain his joy anymore, rushed in like a child, splattering water all around, that even splashed upon Muthupandian, rather than being rebuked by that incident, he smiled at Adhavan’s light, agile form, emanating innocence, bliss and joy, born out of a pure heart that could only be seen in a child, but paradoxically, Adhavan looked much bigger than him, though he looked years younger, he continued to watch him lovingly as he played in the pond, standing a few paces behind him and a few paces away from the shore, Muthupandian took a handful of water, offered it to his ancestors and his divine mother Makali, when he repeated the act, the third time, a cold breeze encircled him, it whirled around him softly, guarding him from all the unseen dangers, then he dipped himself thrice in full awareness, slowly, very slowly, he started rubbing his body gently with the smooth, cold water, it was a very sensuous act, a gentle one, it had its own rhythm to it, an ecstatic dance born out of very natural ways and means, he was completely aware of his each and every movement, he enjoyed all of it immensely, the soft touch of water over his hard flesh; the gentle rubbing of his palms all over his body, with a thin film of water in between; the caressing wind; the resonating sound of the nature; the lapping of the waters against his abdomen; the whistling sound of the trees; his pumping heart; the warmth it generated; his rhythmic steady breath, all of it threw him into an unexpected trance, he stood still, beyond that stillness, he melted, he sensed the joyful heart of Adhavan, he felt the same joy, he overheard the conversation going on between Balaraman and Macham, he became part of it, as he was enjoying the blissful time, he felt a soft bite on his toes that woke him up from the trance, it must have been a relatively big fish, trying to clean the dirt off his feet, though it didn’t hurt him, he kicked it off involuntarily, dipped himself multiple times, took a few more steps inside the pond, till his flat abdomen with muscular rifts was fully immersed in the water, then, he removed his dhoti, rinsed it well, squeezed it hard, tied it around him, dipped again few more times, this time he did it slowly, taking in all the goodness, the water has to offer, then, he looked at Adhavan who was still enjoying the precious moments, alone with the nature, without disturbing him, whistling softly, he approached the campfire, ignoring the dampness, he sat beside Balaraman, became a silent listener to their serious conversation. Macham was asking Balaraman,
“What is killing?”
Balaraman replied,
“Taking a life.”
Macham questioned,
“What do you mean by life?”
Balaraman replied,
“The vital force, the reason behind living.”
Macham replied,
“How do you see it?”
Balaraman replied,
“One can’t see it, but can be felt, it’s in the beat of one’s heart.”
Macham laughed at it, he was in siddhasana, he looked very calm and relaxed, Adhavan was still enjoying his time out in the pond. After a momentary pause Macham continued,
“Balarama, now if I make my heart cease to beat, will you consider me dead? Am I not alive? And If someone kills me in a samadhi, when my heart is not beating, is it not killing?”
Balaraman knew where Macham was getting to, eluding the questions pointed at him, he spoke about a related thing earnestly,
“There is life in everything, all that grows has life, eventually, all that has life dies, one or other day, only the level of senses vary from one genre to another.”
Macham questioned again,
“So you obviously ignored my previous question, fine then, can you teach me about the level of senses you just now mentioned?”
Balaraman replied pleadingly,
“Master, why are you putting me under such a hard test?”
Macham asked,
“It is not over yet, please answer me, please teach me Balarama.”
Balaraman hesitated, he replied slowly,
“It is not killing, it is inflicting pain.”
Macham replied,
“Oh! Which pain do you mean, physical, emotional or psychic? Which is worse?”
Balaraman replied,
“It depends, sometimes, an emotional pain could be far worse than a physical one?”
Macham laughed at Balaraman,
“So you say, killing a man emotionally could be more painful than taking his life?”
Balaraman replied,
“Ah... could be, most probably.”
Unaware of the seriousness of the discussion Adhavan joined them, he was wet, water kept dripping all over him, still without trying to dry himself, he sat close to Macham, enjoyed the proximity of the campfire as well as the inextinguishable inner fire burning brightly within him. Macham studied him carefully for a moment, then he turned his attention back to Balaraman.
He asked Balaraman,
“Where were we? Um... We were talking about killing a living being that can sense. Aren’t we? Yes, you are right, sometime times the emotional pains can be far worse than the physical ones. I do agree with that. Can you now tell me, if I kill without inflicting pain, will it be ok for you?”
Balaraman replied,
“Master please, I really don’t have an honest answer for this?”
Macham replied with a bit of distress,
“Then please, let us not go by mere words, let us feel it, experience it and then decide, since you are the man who is much troubled by it, you will experience it, then, share your experiences with all of us, which will reflect truth, only truth, even if it is against whatever you have been standing by, you should put it out straight without shrouding them with sham. Truth is much superior to god, nothing could ever compromise its righteous stand, even love, kinship and filial duties can be pushed off, ignored, shoved away, if in case, the truth is getting killed by it. As you all know, truth and its kins, are the things that are far better and superior than the almighty god, let us stand by it, let us stand for it, even the unconditional love comes next in line.”
Balaraman came forward, Macham asked him to sit in padmasana, he spoke to him softly,
“Close your eyes, let your breathing stop, let your mind see whatever I am seeing.”
His words had such a tremendous power over Balaraman, immediately a stillness crept upon him, his mind stretched, it travelled and found a healthy male rabbit, hiding deep in a dark burrow, his mind literally took over the rabbit, started ruling it, he started feeling everything the rabbit felt; its pulse; its breathing; its needs; its urges; even its fears, gradually, he got transformed into a rabbit, he became the rabbit, the rabbit became him, in fact, they became one entity, suddenly, it sprinted forward, ran fast, came close to Macham, stood close by his lap, ready to be patted and fondled by him. Macham placed his left palm below its neck and the right above its head, without actually physically touching the rabbit he fondled its spirit, he caressed the vital life force within it, slowly, he guided it up to the crown of its head, the rabbit was thrown into a spiritual ecstasy, it was immensely enjoying the bliss it was obviously endowed with, its eyes were closed and withdrawn, head was a bit cocked up and straight, allowing itself to completely enjoy the sensuous, spiritual pleasure, given unto it by Siddhar Macham, the same was being experienced by Balaraman, he was unaware that he was experiencing whatever the rabbit was experiencing, he was thrown into the same spiritual ecstasy, he was on the verge of leaving his body, just then, in a split second, Macham pulled the vital life force out of the rabbit’s body, the same instant, it dropped dead, at the same spot, its heart had stopped pulsating, Macham had killed the rabbit, in the most appropriate way, in the most blissful way, guiding its life force back to the source it came from, the parabrahmam. Here at the same time, Balaraman was going through everything the rabbit was experiencing, when the spiritual ecstasy reached the climax, the divine lamp within the body, left through the invisible aperture at the crown of his head, and it was racing up toward the source, the parabrahmam, simultaneously his soul left his body, it floated beside its own corpse, whereas the divine lamp, his vital life force, was surging ahead for the final merging, unexpectedly, he saw an open palm, forcing back the lamp into his corpse, at the same time, outside the realm of his consciousness, the moment the vital life force left his body and his soul drifted away, his body collapsed, Muthupandian rushed forward, took the corpse on his lap, not knowing what to do, with the dead body resting on his lap, he looked at Macham in complete bewilderment. Adhavan too was dumbfounded, whereas, Macham was in padmasana, stiff and erect, eyes closed, he remained breathless for a few moments, his heart too had stopped pulsating. Suddenly, in imperceptible moments, Balaraman’s heart started ticking again, at the same moment, Macham opened his eyes, called out loudly,
“Balarama! Get up.”
The voice rang in Balaraman’s mind, slowly he opened his eyes, looked at everyone around, realizing that he was on the lap of Muthupandian, sprung up the same moment, it was like he was born again, everything looked new and fresh, slowly, he recognized the state he was in, came into terms with himself, asked Macham honestly,
“Was it death?”
Macham replied,
“Not everyone will have that type of death. It is very special and unique, reserved for a very few handpicked ones, that is what we call Mukthi, the final supreme merging. Why to complicate? In simple terms, I killed you and sent you back to your god, you call him Lord Vishnu, isn’t it? And I call him, the parabrahmam, the one, the god, the almighty.”
Tears of joy rolled down his cheeks, wiping it off, he said,
“I have understood my mistake, I understood how foolish I have been all throughout my life. I have sinned, I have not stood by the truth that is my ignorance, please forgive me. Right now, for me, you are the parabrahmam, please accept my apologies, please forgive me.”
Macham laughed at his hysterical cries, he asked him,
“Did the killing pain you? Can I kill you again?”
Balaraman was still excited, his arms were shivering, he replied anxiously,
“Yes Master, at your will, but please don’t bring me back, I don’t want to live anymore. I just want to merge.”
Macham smiled at him and replied,
“You are not a rabbit, whose life can be taken at any moment, you are a living human being. Aren’t you? You have much to do, much to accomplish, then how could I allow you to leave, when I myself have been waiting for long years, patiently, for the ultimate, final call.”
All the four laughed at Macham’s reply, soon a silence fell over them, Macham looked at Balaraman piercingly, asked him,
“Now the rabbit is dead, I have killed it without inflicting pain, can we then, cook and feast on it, on this memorable day.”
The soft, serene face of Balaraman grew hard, he remained silent, his mind pondered over all reasonable excuses he could come up with, but to his dismay, he found none, he felt a sudden grief crush him, he looked at Macham, fell to his feet, cried openly,
“If possible, please take away this disgusting, irrational, ungrounded feeling that I get, when I think of eating this corpse... please... please take away this disgusting feeling, crawling all over me, please.”
Balaraman’s honest answer must have moved Macham, he thought very deeply for a few moments, said aloud,
“It is neither the pain nor the killing, so it is not the question of ethics, it is more of a disgusting feeling that you have towards meat and meat eating people. Now we are a step closer to the truth, it is a lot easier for me to remove the source of this nauseous feeling. How wicked it is, when meat eating people are portrayed as unethical, brutal, barbaric, immoral, uncivilized cannibals, who slaughter lives for their carnal pleasures, when the core of it doesn’t have anything to do with the universal ethics, in fact, they are much closer to the naturally existing, peacefully prevailing, ecological balance, so the universal harmony, since they live in tune with their habitat harmoniously, living peacefully, happily, on whatever they get in abundance. How cunningly meat eating people were compared with the cannibals, who kill and eat the flesh of their own species? There should be an end to all this false, unnecessary, unwanted propaganda on the eating habits of people, both on meat eating ones as well as the ones who don’t eat meat. It all sounds ridiculous and untrue.”
He paused for a moment and continued,
“Now Balarama, please come, let us go for one more round. You would need another good experience to change your perceptions forever, discriminating people based on their eating habits are equivalent to discriminating them based on their race, their community, their tradition, their culture and their ancestors. Prejudice is prejudice, wherever you apply it, in whichever way you apply it, in whatever form you apply it.”
Balaraman wiped his tears, steadied himself, tried to focus on his self. Macham came close to him, took his hands, Balaraman felt a strong current pass through him, Macham closed his eyes, allowed his mind to travel and search for an edible root, he found a one, a short distance away from the boulders, then he opened his eyes, sent Adhavan for it. While Adhavan was sprinting towards it, Macham closed his eyes again, infused Balaraman’s mind, took him along with him. Now this time, Balaraman became Adhavan, he was running fast, deep into the wilderness, he felt himself youthful and energetic, his senses were so acute, he even heard the faint sound of the splintering firewood, back at the campfire. He was Adhavan and Adhavan was him. There he found a shrub, he ran towards it, at that moment, Balaraman’s mind left Adhavan, it infused the shrub and it became the shrub, now the shrub was Balaraman and Balaraman was the shrub, Adhavan was trying to forcefully pull out the shrub, he tried it many ways, every time he tried to uproot it, an unbearable pain shot through Balaraman's soul, here at the camp, his face writhed with death agony. Every time Adhavan forced it out, Balaraman’s soul experienced a great pain, it tormented his poor old wretched soul, when he finally uprooted it, Balaraman was literally killed multiple times, but he realized that he didn’t die, as in the previous experience, his soul didn’t leave his body, the divine lamp didn’t soar up to greater heights, rather, he felt a piercing pain, a stifling anguish, everything but the much awaited grateful death that which could have easily ended all his agonies. Balaraman opened his eyes, Adhavan came back running with his bounty, he placed the whole shrub with its big bulbs before Macham. Now Macham asked Balaraman,
“It is not dead yet, isn’t it? It still has life, can we kill it and eat, can you merge with it again and see what happens to you when I torment it once more?”
Balaraman was tormented by the question, he knew the pain he was going through, it was much more disgusting than the previous experience, he cried and he cried like a child.
Macham looked at him piercingly and said,
“What Balarama, you neither want us to eat the corpse that died in a spiritual bliss nor the living shrub that was uprooted painfully? What do you want us to eat then?”
Balaraman wasn’t able to answer Macham, he kept on sobbing continuously, as though Macham was unsatisfied by his tears, he poked him further,
“And now Balarama, can you tell who is impure now? Should Muthupandian go and a take a bath because he took your falling corpse on his lap? Or me who killed the rabbit? Or is it Adhavan who uprooted the plant alive, brought it to us, to feed us?”
Balaraman, cried aloud, shouted,
“Please Master, Please stop. Don’t do this to me? I will eat whatever that is given to me, Henceforth, I will not discriminate people based on their eating habits, because I don’t take meat, I will not consider myself as better than others who take meat. I will not make that mistake again. I will never again estimate a person based on their eating habits. I will not delude myself foolishly into believing that I am purer and greater than the meat eaters, just because they eat meat, neither will I talk about the physical purity again. I will not raise that question again. I will not discriminate people anymore on any basis. I have understood my mistake. I really apologize for my stupid standpoint.”
Then, sobbing he fell to his feet, Macham said,
“Get up Balarama, I did this to you, so that, during later stages, when I am not there, you don’t taint the solemn truth with your eating habits and physical purity concepts. Eating is very personal, so many factors go with it, from one’s habitat to one’s birth, it is very personal, we don’t have any rights to comment upon what one eats, neither could we discriminate humanity based on that, nor we could preach mankind, what they should eat, it is like telling a man that he should copulate with his woman only in this position, you see, it is all very personal stuff that one should not indulge upon. I have seen many disciples doing that, even though their Gurus weren’t so, they derive a sense of psychological supremacy over others by adhering to such norms, abiding by such misleading, delusive, concepts. You people should not fall trap to it. Again, I tell you, eating meat is a personal habit, self-realization has nothing to do with it, don’t let yourself indulge into taking sides, which either way, will not lead to self realization, they are just eating habits, nothing else.”
After a pause, Macham continued,
“The inherent nature of the ecology is to thrive on various species other than itself, flourish on it, reproduce as much as it could, uninhibited, paving way for its own species, its own line, to flourish on this vast expansive earth, fill the land with their offsprings that indeed holds good for even human beings, of course even for siddhars, who are in fact human beings. All species feed on its natural habitat, especially on those they get in abundance, and if you see it with clarity, a lioness would hunt just a deer for its family, even if it has potential to kill all the thousand deers that is wandering out there, well within its reach, but it is satisfied with a meager few, similarly, a goat doesn’t eat away all the pasture on the same day, an elephant doesn’t empty the whole pond, it takes in only what it wants, it lives on its rich habitat without dwindling it, that is ecological balance, a natural adaptation, living on what you get in abundance, it is purely based on the eating habits of the species, this has nothing do with leading a spiritual life or attaining salvation. To be more precise, lions live on deers, deers live on pastures, pastures live on manure, and so on, it is so simple, its ecological balance, it need not be complicated by the supremacy deriving, closer to god principles, as you have seen, that in truth, it has nothing to do with it. The ecological balance, neither preaches extinction of one species over another, nor independent living of all species together, it is the very nature of all species to survive, feed itself, reproduce, cling on to its clan, improve its defense, sustain its well being and thrive on the abundance. The whole line of feed is very sensitive, totally dependent on what is existing, right out there, if carnivorous beings are mutated to become herbivorous... in the worst scenario, what if homo sapiens, an omnivorous species, are cunningly transformed into herbivorous ones, by invoking the guilt filament, letting it burn in their minds, conceptually driving them to become unnatural, as though living on a feed-stock is equivalent to killing a live human being, letting the guilt linger on their minds, paving way to dominance within the same species, letting discrimination soar up, aiming to end the omnivorous nature of the species, what for? Will it all save the planet or will it kill the planet? What good will it do to the mankind? What good will it do the humanity? What good will it bestow upon mother nature? What good will it do to the ecology? It will not only create a ecological imbalance, it will also kill the amicable, harmonious peace, that exist now, among all living beings, together.”
Macham paused again, a deep silence fell over the gathering, he threw the dead rabbit and the shrub across to Muthupandian, said aloud,
“Cook for all of us.”
Saying that he walked towards the pond, had a refreshing bath, fished with his dhoti, came back naked with four dead fishes wrapped tight in his wet dhoti, after giving away the fishes to Muthupandian, he took his dhoti, squeezed it well, without washing it, wrapped it again around his narrow hips, then he sent away Adhavan to fetch a few large leaves to lay down the supper, later, relaxed, he studied the grill made by Muthupandian, the food was getting ready, it had a rabbit and four large roots, soon it will be loaded with the fishes he brought, smelling the food heartily, he laid back, let his mind drift away for a few moments, when he woke up, the hot, steaming, grilled, food items were placed right before him, neatly, on a few large leaves laced up together, it had, four fishes, four bulbs and one rabbit.
Macham sat in siddhasana, asked them to come close together, then he asked Muthupandian to offer the food to his divine mother Makali, that same moment, his body shuddered, it convulsed for 8 seconds, once it subsided, Macham raised his arms above his head, thanked his Guru, bowed to everyone, and said
“Eat.”
That day, when the moon was high in the skies, the foursome had fish, meat and roots. They feasted on it heartily, they savored every bit of it, Goddess Makali ate along with them through Muthupandian, so we could say five of them had supper that night, four males and one female, together, from the same leaf. It was the first time, Adhavan and Balaraman had meat and fish. After supper, they cleaned the spot together, washed their arms and legs, extinguished the burning torch, flocked around the camp fire, enjoyed much the warmth it gave off. Adhavan was the first one to doze off, soon, one after another they fell for it, slept along side one another, peacefully, covering well their bodies from head to toe, with their damp dhotis.
Macham and Balaraman were up, well before the sunrise, after attending to their morning needs, they bathed leisurely in the beautiful pond, while they were bathing, Macham asked Balaraman,
“Have you ever chanted in the waters, that too, in chandrakalai?”
Balaraman said,
“No.”
Macham replied,
“Then, you should try it today, stand firmly on your right leg, fold your left one, place the left heel on the inner sides of your right knee, chant your mantras, looking at the sun, of course, you can close your eyes, but remain in the same position until you are done with all your chantings.”
Balaraman bowed to him and said,
“Yes Master, let me try.”
Afterwards, Macham walked towards the shore, found a neat, cool place, sat there in padmasana facing the rising sun, focused on his breath intently, the next moment, he attained a samadhi and remained breathless, there, in the pond, Balaraman did as asked by Macham, soon, his mind reached the state of tranquility that he had never known before, he even saw the whorl, remained within it, for almost an hour, unaware of the pain in his legs. The sun was spreading its rays, though Adhavan was awake, he didn’t feel like even moving his arms a bit, whereas Muthupandian was busy like a bee, attending to his morning needs, when he came back after a bath, to his dismay, he still found Adhavan asleep, to Muthupandian, it is a humanly impossible task to sleep with the sun’s rays striking hard on ones face, he looked at Adhavan in astonishment, without disturbing him, he sat beside him, he relaxed, he didn’t force himself to be still, but slowly, a stillness crept upon him, his eyes took up that peculiar bulging, he continued to watch without thoughts, he just watched, he didn’t think, there wasn't any need to think, everything was in place. Adhavan was in a deep trance, as like Balaraman, he too was inside the whorl, but he never attended to his needs, neither did he pray, nor did he strain his muscles, but still, he was experiencing the same state Balaraman was experiencing. It just happens to him very naturally, it blossoms in him just like that, at any place, at any moment, at any time.
Balaraman was the first one to come out of the trance, slowly he came to the shore, eased his calf muscles and thighs, prostrated right before Macham, who still was in a samadhi, then, he came close and sat near, by the sleeping Adhavan, who too was resting within the whorl—the mother’s womb. Time just flew by, after two hours of morning samadhi, Macham slowly opened his eyes, tried to move his legs, finding it bit difficult, looked around for help, Muthupandian and Balaraman understanding his situation well, immediately rushed to his assistance, massaged his calf muscles and thighs, patiently, helped him to get up on his feet. Adhavan was still asleep, even after Macham was up. Macham looked at him intently, entered the whorl Adhavan was in, whispered,
“Come out.”
The next moment, to both Muthupandian and Balaraman’s surprise, Adhavan got up from his trance, tied his dhoti well around his narrow hips and was ready for the day, only then, Muthupandian and Balaraman understood his true state, even though Adhavan was lying around in the hot sun, pretending to be asleep, he still was deep within himself, deep inside the whorl, experiencing a state closer to samadhi.
As Adhavan approached them, Macham asked Muthupandian,
“Now can you take us to the second spot?”
With Muthupandian leading the front, the group walked in silence for another 2 hours, they were standing before a smoothly flowing stream. The vast expanse of the land was filled with the neem trees, wherever Macham turned around, he saw only neems, as he was keenly studying the landscape, Adhavan slowly left the group to attend to his morning needs. Macham wandered around the place for almost an hour, he tasted various soil, water, and air, studied the bed of the stream, even counted the number of hill peaks he could see, then he selected a spot, dug up a few feet to check the nature of the underground soil, fortunately, a spring gushed up, they drank from it, washed their arms and legs, then, they continued to wander about, exploring the wilderness. On seeing them busy, Adhavan stepped into the waters, leisurely enjoyed a relaxing bath in the gushing stream. Done with a thorough study, Macham looked out for Adhavan, he was still in the stream, with his hands raised well above his head, palms clasped in prayer, in adoration to the almighty, his body shone brightly in the hot sun, it glittered like gold. Right across where he was standing, a few feet from the spring they dug out, there was a big, a very big, gigantic neem tree, it looked odd for a neem tree to grow so huge, especially when the surrounding ones looked comparatively small. Macham thanked his guru, he selected the big one, turned around and looked out for Adhavan, he was still in the stream, enjoying the soft flow of the water immensely, Macham didn’t have a heart to disturb him, so he decided to wait for him under the shades of the chosen neem, a short distance from the stream, a few paces from the spring. Slowly, after having enough of time in the water, satisfied, Adhavan came out relaxed. Studying the landscape, he approached Macham, on the way, he drank few full palms of water from the freshly dug out spring, after that, he continued to walk towards Macham. There, under the shades of the neem tree, Macham was discussing with Muthupandian and Balaraman about the importance of a good landscape, Adhavan without interrupting their conversation, joined them in silence, Macham continued to talk,
“In another 3 hours of steady walk, beyond this neem forest, you would reach Pari Santhai, the third spot you are mentioning is somewhere there, at its border, but unfortunately, the water there, dries out in summers and the place will be heavily crowded during the market days, then, in search of water, you may need to walk all the distance back to the pond we bathed this morning, even the stream you see right out there dries up occasionally, especially during the hot days in the summer, but if you could dig a well, exactly at the spot where we found the spring today, this place will never run out of water. Socially, this place will become very important, as you know, it is very close to Pari Santhai, and when you people start inhabiting this place, others too will come down to make settlements. And if you cross the stream, walk straight for a day and a night, you will reach River Nayili, else you just could follow the stream, it will take you there, but it is a very dense forest, very rarely people trespass it, even the villagers beyond Nayili, neither tried to inhabit it nor made through it, in fact, if they want to come to Pari Santhai, they would need to take a roundabout route, for 5 days and 5 nights, but the straight way out is just 1 day and 1 night. Very few early aspirants, have explored those dense woods, and very few have come out alive, like Adhavan.”
Macham looked at Adhavan slantingly, held his gaze for a moment, then resumed,
“Before that, 2 centuries ago, a very old man, somehow crossed those dense forest alive, spent the rest of his life wandering around this neem forest carefree, he never looked further, since his vocation didn’t fall in line with ours, we Siddhars didn’t take him in, but we made sure, he lived till his last breath happily, without physical and mental infirmity, he lived most of his life in deep penance looking for God, but he never found it and he died looking for him, we buried him somewhere here and planted a banyan tree over his mortal remains.”
Macham closed his eyes, caressed his forehead, probed his mind deep and said,
“Oh, it is there, beyond the stream, in an hour’s walk, at the borders of the dense forest, his spirit guarded the borders, it acted like a fort, preventing people from trespassing this region, in those days, when siddhars walked these places, it played an important role in guarding the sanctity of the caves in the Vasimuni hills and the remote ones in the Venmudiyar hills.”
Adhavan realized that it is, his great-great-grandfather, whom Macham was talking about, soon Adhavan felt an innocent joy in his heart, he felt less burdened. Macham smiled at him and continued,
“So you know the importance of this place, the likeliness of it getting established into a much sought divine abode.”
Muthupandian hesitated for a moment, asked,
“Master, by building a temple here, will we not spoil the sanctity of this region.”
Macham laughed and replied,
“After Velir’s formed a close power circle among themselves, Vasimuni hills and Venmudiyar hills came under their strict control, they guarded it religiously, from then on, none of them dare crossed Pari Santhai, had guts to venture the deep forest out there without their permission, so are the laughing hills.”
He paused for a moment and continued,
“The great Siddhar Agastiyar is one of the most revered forefather of the Velirs, so from the olden days, Velirs respected siddhars, paid tribute to them, adored them, guarded them like precious jewels, more than their lives.”
Muthupandian asked,
“Then shouldn't we get the permission of the Velirs, if we are to stay here.”
Macham penetrated his soul, closed his eyes, after a short pause, replied, this time his voice reverberated across,
“Fear not, when I am here, this is the land given to me by the Velirs and I am giving it to you, as I have said before, you can bring your kins here. I can count 17 families that look up to you, those that really need you, those that will always be loyal to you, bring them here, let them toil this land under the graceful presence of the divine Goddess Makali. Though you have crossed 50, we will get you married soon, you will have kids, they will have many offsprings, your lineage will be strengthened to an extent it can’t be uprooted. Your people will flourish in this land. What else a man would need to make his life meaningful?”
Muthupandian was moved to tears, he said softly,
“Yes Master. Will meet them in their dreams, tonight. Will ask them to come over.”
Macham told him, pointing at Adhavan and Balaraman,
“Teach them both, how to do it... at leisure.”
Muthupandian replied, “Yes, Master. Will do.”
Then Macham said,
“Go find yourself food, eat and rest, in the evening, during sunset, I will request Goddess Makali to take this neem tree, from then onwards, it will become her divine abode. You don’t need to bring me food, help yourself with what Mother nature is ready to offer you. You can go now.”
Saying that, he sat in padmasana, focused on his breath, caught hold of it, attained samadhi. Adhavan, Balaraman and Muthupandian walked deep into the neem forest, they found nothing, but for few birds flying around, here and there, Adhavan sensing that they should not be looking out for food here, pulled Muthupandian by arms, said,
“Lets us fish, there are so many fishes in the stream, we will have enough for our lunch as well as for supper, so, can we take that time and wander a bit into the woods, find that Banyan tree, Siddhar Macham was talking about.”
Muthupandian realized that it was the first time Adhavan had talked to him, he smiled at him and said,
“Yes. Let us go and see it for ourselves”
Then they looked at Balaraman, he nodded in approval, all three turned around, moved towards the stream, crossed it without much effort. Muthupandian asked Adhavan and Balaraman to wait for a few minutes, squatted near a flat stone, placed the spear head over it, held it firmly with his left hand, using his right hand picked a small smooth pebble, rubbed it back and forth, smoothly, rhythmically, over the edges of the spearhead, every time he rubbed it over, sparks of fire shot out from it, finally, he ran his finger over the sharpness, satisfied, he stood up, stretched his back, nodded approvingly, then, together, they approached the dark woods. Adhavan led the pack, moved forward, without hesitation, in the direction pointed out by Macham. After an hour’s walk, centuries old banyan tree appeared in their sight, it was so incredibly big, massive and enormous, it in itself looked like a forest, widespread and expansive which could easily accommodate 1000 men, Adhavan on seeing the large bats, hanging upside down, ushered his comrades to remain quiet, thinking about his great-great-grandfather, he fondled gently one of its branches, a chillness surrounded him, he felt the presence of his spirit, it was a very emotional situation, his eyes watered, he felt very grateful, thanking him, he turned around to see Muthupandian and Balaraman, they were looking at him curiously, Adhavan was not interested in exposing his personal matters, so as to bring a shift in the mood, he asked them,
“Do you know how to make a brew out of these barks and fruits?”
Balaraman said,
“Yes, but we would need containers and filters, we could also concentrate it, into lethal dosages that would help us to go without food for days together, make our bodies strong and venomous.”
Muthupandian said,
“It simply means we can’t use it for the day’s needs, you know, I am really starving.”
Adhavan smiled at him,
“Let us wander around this place, see if we can find some edible fruits.”
They walked around the spot, finally found a grove of wild banana trees, whose berries were very short, in fact, shorter than one’s index finger, they weren’t fleshy too, but they smelled heavenly, the ripened yellow ones were being pestered by swarms of flies, chasing them away, Muthupandian, pulled a ripened one, peeled away the skin, ate the berry, his eyes shone, it must have tasted really good, he handpicked few more ripened ones, gave it to Balaraman and Adhavan, as they were relishing on it, Muthupandian started collecting a few more hands of good, ripened bananas. Once they have gathered enough, they decided to return, while they were returning with loads of bananas, Adhavan stopped for a moment, near the banyan tree, offered 6 ripened bananas for his ancestors, placed them below the center trunk, thanked them again from the bottom of his heart, then he joined his companions, walked along with them to the stream, it was around mid-noon, the journey was proving hectic and tiresome.
By the time the trio reached the stream, they have emptied half of what they have gathered, none of them were hungry anymore, they didn’t feel the need to fish, so they crossed the stream silently, walked towards the big neem tree, there, under its cool shades, Macham was still in samadhi, they moved to the other side of the banyan tree, so as not to disturb Macham, there, they cleaned a spot, placed the remaining hands of banana in heaps, sat around them and relaxed, slowly, unaware, their minds drifted into a deep sleep, born out of sheer tiredness. They must have overslept, around late evening, Macham woke up all the three, sent them away for a bath, took a few bananas for himself, savored it, while guarding the remaining. The trio returned soon, leaving them to their bananas, he went to the stream for a refreshing bath, he came back soon well before sunset, dried his body, stood staring at the big tree, exactly at the time of the sunset, he called out for all the three, resting on the other side of the tree, they grouped before him, he took the spear from Muthupandian, pulled him closer, took him by his hand, walked towards the trunk of the tree, Adhavan and Balaraman followed them, with his bare hands, he rubbed a spot in the middle part of the trunk, exactly at its center, then, chanting “ommmmm’, he gently caressed the spot, they were able to feel the presence of the Goddess Makali, the whole surrounding was charged, a turbulent wind raced across furiously, threatening to uproot all the neem trees in the forest, right at that moment, Macham slid his left thumb over the sharp edge of the spearhead, red, hot blood oozed out of the cut, he smeared the blood over the center spot of the trunk, formed a dark red circle, continuing to chant “ommmmm’ pressed his oozing thumb hard against the center, the next moment an extraordinary, supernatural force, entered the neem tree in the form of a pure, dazzling, brilliant, white, glowing light, everyone saw it with their wide open eyes, it was so bright, it blinded them all with its brilliance, they saw a miracle happening right before them, they saw the divine goddess enter the neem tree in the limelight, it was just incredible, the whole tree shook vigorously, and it took much longer for the spasms in Muthupandian’s body to subside, tears of joy rolled down heaven’s eyes, a soft drizzling drenched their souls, it all lasted for a few countable moments, then, a deep, impenetrable silence engulfed them, drained out of energy, Macham leaned over the neem tree, licking the blood in his wound, he spoke softly,
“This neem tree is now her abode, as a part of the transformation, from this moment onwards, it will keep shedding its leaves, in next 3 days, it will wither away all her leaves and will remain naked till the coming new moon day, that is when you will light the first lamp here, at its base, offer her water, fruits, flowers, milk and honey. Balaraman can chant mantras to elevate her mood. She will be much pleased, that night she will bless this land with a heavy downpour and it will continue to rain for a week, on the 7th day morning, you can see the first leaves sprout out of this barren tree, that is the sign from her, that she has accepted this land, your kins and the humble abode you have given to her. From then on, she will be ready to accept your daily offerings, attend to her devotees, bless them intimately, unbound. Then you can build walls around this place, build a hut around this tree, dig a well out there, raise a whole village right from here, no evil spirit can dare enter this land, no wicked soul can step pass her borders, she will guard this land and her people like her own children, she will be your guardian angel, serve her well, your people never starve a day.”
Unable to hold onto the ecstatic moments any further, Macham let out a moan, sat on the grounds, remained speechless for few moments, the trio flocked around him, waited patiently for him to come out of his spiritual ecstasy, then slowly gasping for breath, he gathered himself up, continued to talk in whispers, they listened carefully to everything he was saying,
“Build yourselves, each a hut, attend to her in complete reverence, she will bestow upon you more than what you would ever need in this life, of course, Adhavan couldn’t be part of it, he has other calls to attend, you both need to partake in building this temple, it should be built around this tree, it will remain the center of any erections you raise, but then, you should never fell this tree, and it will never again shed its leaves, you have seen her enter it, similarly, she will stretch and inhabit every single living creature in this place, it will all become her possession, her subjects, they will fulfill her commands, they will listen to her, they will be her face, she will act through them, she will guide the spirits that dwell here, she will rule like a queen a majestically till the next pralayam. You both will live a happy, spiritual, blissful life here.”
Macham remained silent for a moment, then continued,
“Again, I tell you, don’t fuss yourself with the offerings, you offer what you eat, in later stages, she will pull many people from many different places, then, it will very naturally evolve into a place where you may not be able to offer her meat, fish and eggs, as non meat eaters will also come to her, in thousands, with wide open arms, seeking her grace. They will look up to her, for her divine interventions, then when it happens, you need to make those offerings privately at your home, as I have told you before, you should not disrespect any man’s eating habits, if non meat eaters have started to flock here, then that is a sign for you to stop offering her meat in this place, which you can very well do at your home, give away the food to the likes who eat meat, there isn’t anything wrong about it. It will not only make her happy, in addition, she will be proud of you. But here within the temple, when both these types come and go, either you need to have separate altars or choose the way that will comfortably accommodate both. It will be a stain on her, if her place has two altars, she won’t wish that, so act in ways that will make her happy, not in ways that will make a particular sectarian happy, tolerance is a much needed virtue, when different kinds of people come together from different walks of life. You both, must have that tolerance, till your last breath, at all circumstances, without fail.”
After a long pause, Macham talked openly to the Goddess Makali,
“Bring peace, prosperity and joy to all those who come to you. Bless them all.”
The moment he said it, a tremor went through Muthupandian’s body, that again is a sign from her, that she has warmly accepted siddhar Macham’s request. The drizzling stopped. He then, asked Muthupandian to light a campfire, prepare for nights stay and supper. As the trio got busy with it, Macham leaned onto the trunk, closed his eyes, inhaled deeply, calmed down his breath, ordered his soul, to a far off place, where Nedunenkilli was struggling to make a decision, purely to help him out from the unavoidable fall, he would eventually land upon, but alas, he was a bit late, what had happened there gave him cold shudders.
Chapter 01 The Realization of the Vocation
Once the duo had left the scene, Macham’s attention fell on Balaraman and Muthupandian, he inquired them,
“How did it go? Have you found the right spot, for erecting a temple?”
Muthupandian replied,
“We have identified three good spots, but we would like you to make the final decision, point us the best one.”
Macham smiled at them and said,
“What will this old man do out there, you people know better, in case, if I choose something other than what you have selected, will you not be angry with me?”
Muthupandian hesitated a bit, said,
“No Master, we would rather be happy.”
Macham nodded, let out a short sigh, looked up at the stars, lost himself in deep thoughts, for a few moments he remained silent, then he looked at Balaraman and spoke earnestly,
“There is something you need to know further, a solemn act would remove the final discrimination that is still blinding your wisdom, pushing you to make biased views.”
Then he turned towards Sarutha and said,
“Let us spend a few nights outdoors, in the wilderness, day and night, one with nature, don’t make us any food, don’t come for any assistance, and most, don’t expect us to come at least for a day or two. Once I am back, I will leave for Vasimuni hills.”
Then he looked at the gleeful face of Adhavan, for he was almost up on his feet, ready for the exploration, desperate for spending time in the raw untamed wilderness, Macham patted his shoulders and said aloud,
“Let us make it more interesting and educative, let us go in there, just like that, without any preparation, face boldly, the real time situations that we come across, as a measure of precaution, Muthupandian alone can carry a spear and a burning torch, nothing more.”
Balaraman was obviously surprised at the audacity they both had, especially that of Macham’s, irrespective of his age and the wisdom he possessed; the unsurpassable spiritual powers he was bestowed with; the high position he held in the society that even kings bow to, his willingness to opt for such an adventure, apt only for kids, was really intriguing and incomprehensive, he knew well, not to interfere in the ways of the siddhars, continuing to admire the inherent quality in him, he eagerly joined the party.
Mathivathani came out with a burning torch, handed it over to Muthupandian, Kayalvizi gave Balaraman a flask filled with the oil, the party was up on their feet, ready to leave, Sarutha interrupted and asked Macham,
“Won’t you have supper tonight?”
Macham replied,
“Mother nature will send us food when we are hungry, she will feed us from now on, we will eat whatever she sends us across.”
Then he looked at Muthupandian and said,
“Please take us to the first spot.”
Ever gentle disposition of Balaraman tightened a bit, it lost its serenity, a mild trouble lingered in his mind, it was clearly visible in his pale, withdrawn face, still, he accompanied them, they walked together, close to one another. Muthupandian led the front, with the burning torch in his left hand and a long spear in his right, he walked sure-footed, straight into the wilderness, Macham followed him, along with Adhavan by his right and Balaraman to his left, they walked together in silence, leaving the womenfolk rest at home, undisturbed by the unending expectations of the men, without whom, the whole place will look empty and uninhabited, slowly, the foursome merged with the darkness, even the faint light of the torch was swallowed by the silent night.
After an hour’s walk, they reached the first spot, it had a beautiful moonlit pond, encircled by boulders all around, the natural formation was almost a simple replica of a royal fort, as though, erected for guarding the purity of the pristine clear pond. Adhavan looked into the pond, saw his own reflection and that of the waning moon. Balaraman stood beside him in silence, with an inner turmoil brewing deep inside him, contemplating over the words said by Siddhar Macham. Leaving them unattended, Macham swiftly climbed up the boulders, Muthupandian followed him, they studied the vast expanse thoroughly, when they jointly climbed down the boulders, Macham said to Muthupandian,
“Let us spend the night here, alone and aloof, under the immense presence of mother nature.”
Then they wandered around with Adhavan and Balaraman, collected a handful of firewood; found an open spot nearby the pond; heaped all the firewood at the center; sat around it; stretched their legs and arms; eased their mind, body and soul, allowing the softness of the night, infuse their blessed souls, slowly, as the cold wind caressed their warm bodies, Muthupandian gave the torch to Macham, requested him to light the firewood, he did as requested, the camp was lit, the golden light encompassed all the four. The silence mixed well with the campfire, silent cool night, and the wild environment, it was hard for anyone to bring up a topic for the night’s discussion as their minds were busy pondering over their personal miseries, Adhavan broke the engulfing silence, asked Macham straight,
“Can I bathe in this pond?”
Macham said,
“Yes, please go ahead.”
Muthupandian said,
“Let me also join him.”
They both walked towards the pond, as they came close to the edge, Adhavan unable to contain his joy anymore, rushed in like a child, splattering water all around, that even splashed upon Muthupandian, rather than being rebuked by that incident, he smiled at Adhavan’s light, agile form, emanating innocence, bliss and joy, born out of a pure heart that could only be seen in a child, but paradoxically, Adhavan looked much bigger than him, though he looked years younger, he continued to watch him lovingly as he played in the pond, standing a few paces behind him and a few paces away from the shore, Muthupandian took a handful of water, offered it to his ancestors and his divine mother Makali, when he repeated the act, the third time, a cold breeze encircled him, it whirled around him softly, guarding him from all the unseen dangers, then he dipped himself thrice in full awareness, slowly, very slowly, he started rubbing his body gently with the smooth, cold water, it was a very sensuous act, a gentle one, it had its own rhythm to it, an ecstatic dance born out of very natural ways and means, he was completely aware of his each and every movement, he enjoyed all of it immensely, the soft touch of water over his hard flesh; the gentle rubbing of his palms all over his body, with a thin film of water in between; the caressing wind; the resonating sound of the nature; the lapping of the waters against his abdomen; the whistling sound of the trees; his pumping heart; the warmth it generated; his rhythmic steady breath, all of it threw him into an unexpected trance, he stood still, beyond that stillness, he melted, he sensed the joyful heart of Adhavan, he felt the same joy, he overheard the conversation going on between Balaraman and Macham, he became part of it, as he was enjoying the blissful time, he felt a soft bite on his toes that woke him up from the trance, it must have been a relatively big fish, trying to clean the dirt off his feet, though it didn’t hurt him, he kicked it off involuntarily, dipped himself multiple times, took a few more steps inside the pond, till his flat abdomen with muscular rifts was fully immersed in the water, then, he removed his dhoti, rinsed it well, squeezed it hard, tied it around him, dipped again few more times, this time he did it slowly, taking in all the goodness, the water has to offer, then, he looked at Adhavan who was still enjoying the precious moments, alone with the nature, without disturbing him, whistling softly, he approached the campfire, ignoring the dampness, he sat beside Balaraman, became a silent listener to their serious conversation. Macham was asking Balaraman,
“What is killing?”
Balaraman replied,
“Taking a life.”
Macham questioned,
“What do you mean by life?”
Balaraman replied,
“The vital force, the reason behind living.”
Macham replied,
“How do you see it?”
Balaraman replied,
“One can’t see it, but can be felt, it’s in the beat of one’s heart.”
Macham laughed at it, he was in siddhasana, he looked very calm and relaxed, Adhavan was still enjoying his time out in the pond. After a momentary pause Macham continued,
“Balarama, now if I make my heart cease to beat, will you consider me dead? Am I not alive? And If someone kills me in a samadhi, when my heart is not beating, is it not killing?”
Balaraman knew where Macham was getting to, eluding the questions pointed at him, he spoke about a related thing earnestly,
“There is life in everything, all that grows has life, eventually, all that has life dies, one or other day, only the level of senses vary from one genre to another.”
Macham questioned again,
“So you obviously ignored my previous question, fine then, can you teach me about the level of senses you just now mentioned?”
Balaraman replied pleadingly,
“Master, why are you putting me under such a hard test?”
Macham asked,
“It is not over yet, please answer me, please teach me Balarama.”
Balaraman hesitated, he replied slowly,
“It is not killing, it is inflicting pain.”
Macham replied,
“Oh! Which pain do you mean, physical, emotional or psychic? Which is worse?”
Balaraman replied,
“It depends, sometimes, an emotional pain could be far worse than a physical one?”
Macham laughed at Balaraman,
“So you say, killing a man emotionally could be more painful than taking his life?”
Balaraman replied,
“Ah... could be, most probably.”
Unaware of the seriousness of the discussion Adhavan joined them, he was wet, water kept dripping all over him, still without trying to dry himself, he sat close to Macham, enjoyed the proximity of the campfire as well as the inextinguishable inner fire burning brightly within him. Macham studied him carefully for a moment, then he turned his attention back to Balaraman.
He asked Balaraman,
“Where were we? Um... We were talking about killing a living being that can sense. Aren’t we? Yes, you are right, sometime times the emotional pains can be far worse than the physical ones. I do agree with that. Can you now tell me, if I kill without inflicting pain, will it be ok for you?”
Balaraman replied,
“Master please, I really don’t have an honest answer for this?”
Macham replied with a bit of distress,
“Then please, let us not go by mere words, let us feel it, experience it and then decide, since you are the man who is much troubled by it, you will experience it, then, share your experiences with all of us, which will reflect truth, only truth, even if it is against whatever you have been standing by, you should put it out straight without shrouding them with sham. Truth is much superior to god, nothing could ever compromise its righteous stand, even love, kinship and filial duties can be pushed off, ignored, shoved away, if in case, the truth is getting killed by it. As you all know, truth and its kins, are the things that are far better and superior than the almighty god, let us stand by it, let us stand for it, even the unconditional love comes next in line.”
Balaraman came forward, Macham asked him to sit in padmasana, he spoke to him softly,
“Close your eyes, let your breathing stop, let your mind see whatever I am seeing.”
His words had such a tremendous power over Balaraman, immediately a stillness crept upon him, his mind stretched, it travelled and found a healthy male rabbit, hiding deep in a dark burrow, his mind literally took over the rabbit, started ruling it, he started feeling everything the rabbit felt; its pulse; its breathing; its needs; its urges; even its fears, gradually, he got transformed into a rabbit, he became the rabbit, the rabbit became him, in fact, they became one entity, suddenly, it sprinted forward, ran fast, came close to Macham, stood close by his lap, ready to be patted and fondled by him. Macham placed his left palm below its neck and the right above its head, without actually physically touching the rabbit he fondled its spirit, he caressed the vital life force within it, slowly, he guided it up to the crown of its head, the rabbit was thrown into a spiritual ecstasy, it was immensely enjoying the bliss it was obviously endowed with, its eyes were closed and withdrawn, head was a bit cocked up and straight, allowing itself to completely enjoy the sensuous, spiritual pleasure, given unto it by Siddhar Macham, the same was being experienced by Balaraman, he was unaware that he was experiencing whatever the rabbit was experiencing, he was thrown into the same spiritual ecstasy, he was on the verge of leaving his body, just then, in a split second, Macham pulled the vital life force out of the rabbit’s body, the same instant, it dropped dead, at the same spot, its heart had stopped pulsating, Macham had killed the rabbit, in the most appropriate way, in the most blissful way, guiding its life force back to the source it came from, the parabrahmam. Here at the same time, Balaraman was going through everything the rabbit was experiencing, when the spiritual ecstasy reached the climax, the divine lamp within the body, left through the invisible aperture at the crown of his head, and it was racing up toward the source, the parabrahmam, simultaneously his soul left his body, it floated beside its own corpse, whereas the divine lamp, his vital life force, was surging ahead for the final merging, unexpectedly, he saw an open palm, forcing back the lamp into his corpse, at the same time, outside the realm of his consciousness, the moment the vital life force left his body and his soul drifted away, his body collapsed, Muthupandian rushed forward, took the corpse on his lap, not knowing what to do, with the dead body resting on his lap, he looked at Macham in complete bewilderment. Adhavan too was dumbfounded, whereas, Macham was in padmasana, stiff and erect, eyes closed, he remained breathless for a few moments, his heart too had stopped pulsating. Suddenly, in imperceptible moments, Balaraman’s heart started ticking again, at the same moment, Macham opened his eyes, called out loudly,
“Balarama! Get up.”
The voice rang in Balaraman’s mind, slowly he opened his eyes, looked at everyone around, realizing that he was on the lap of Muthupandian, sprung up the same moment, it was like he was born again, everything looked new and fresh, slowly, he recognized the state he was in, came into terms with himself, asked Macham honestly,
“Was it death?”
Macham replied,
“Not everyone will have that type of death. It is very special and unique, reserved for a very few handpicked ones, that is what we call Mukthi, the final supreme merging. Why to complicate? In simple terms, I killed you and sent you back to your god, you call him Lord Vishnu, isn’t it? And I call him, the parabrahmam, the one, the god, the almighty.”
Tears of joy rolled down his cheeks, wiping it off, he said,
“I have understood my mistake, I understood how foolish I have been all throughout my life. I have sinned, I have not stood by the truth that is my ignorance, please forgive me. Right now, for me, you are the parabrahmam, please accept my apologies, please forgive me.”
Macham laughed at his hysterical cries, he asked him,
“Did the killing pain you? Can I kill you again?”
Balaraman was still excited, his arms were shivering, he replied anxiously,
“Yes Master, at your will, but please don’t bring me back, I don’t want to live anymore. I just want to merge.”
Macham smiled at him and replied,
“You are not a rabbit, whose life can be taken at any moment, you are a living human being. Aren’t you? You have much to do, much to accomplish, then how could I allow you to leave, when I myself have been waiting for long years, patiently, for the ultimate, final call.”
All the four laughed at Macham’s reply, soon a silence fell over them, Macham looked at Balaraman piercingly, asked him,
“Now the rabbit is dead, I have killed it without inflicting pain, can we then, cook and feast on it, on this memorable day.”
The soft, serene face of Balaraman grew hard, he remained silent, his mind pondered over all reasonable excuses he could come up with, but to his dismay, he found none, he felt a sudden grief crush him, he looked at Macham, fell to his feet, cried openly,
“If possible, please take away this disgusting, irrational, ungrounded feeling that I get, when I think of eating this corpse... please... please take away this disgusting feeling, crawling all over me, please.”
Balaraman’s honest answer must have moved Macham, he thought very deeply for a few moments, said aloud,
“It is neither the pain nor the killing, so it is not the question of ethics, it is more of a disgusting feeling that you have towards meat and meat eating people. Now we are a step closer to the truth, it is a lot easier for me to remove the source of this nauseous feeling. How wicked it is, when meat eating people are portrayed as unethical, brutal, barbaric, immoral, uncivilized cannibals, who slaughter lives for their carnal pleasures, when the core of it doesn’t have anything to do with the universal ethics, in fact, they are much closer to the naturally existing, peacefully prevailing, ecological balance, so the universal harmony, since they live in tune with their habitat harmoniously, living peacefully, happily, on whatever they get in abundance. How cunningly meat eating people were compared with the cannibals, who kill and eat the flesh of their own species? There should be an end to all this false, unnecessary, unwanted propaganda on the eating habits of people, both on meat eating ones as well as the ones who don’t eat meat. It all sounds ridiculous and untrue.”
He paused for a moment and continued,
“Now Balarama, please come, let us go for one more round. You would need another good experience to change your perceptions forever, discriminating people based on their eating habits are equivalent to discriminating them based on their race, their community, their tradition, their culture and their ancestors. Prejudice is prejudice, wherever you apply it, in whichever way you apply it, in whatever form you apply it.”
Balaraman wiped his tears, steadied himself, tried to focus on his self. Macham came close to him, took his hands, Balaraman felt a strong current pass through him, Macham closed his eyes, allowed his mind to travel and search for an edible root, he found a one, a short distance away from the boulders, then he opened his eyes, sent Adhavan for it. While Adhavan was sprinting towards it, Macham closed his eyes again, infused Balaraman’s mind, took him along with him. Now this time, Balaraman became Adhavan, he was running fast, deep into the wilderness, he felt himself youthful and energetic, his senses were so acute, he even heard the faint sound of the splintering firewood, back at the campfire. He was Adhavan and Adhavan was him. There he found a shrub, he ran towards it, at that moment, Balaraman’s mind left Adhavan, it infused the shrub and it became the shrub, now the shrub was Balaraman and Balaraman was the shrub, Adhavan was trying to forcefully pull out the shrub, he tried it many ways, every time he tried to uproot it, an unbearable pain shot through Balaraman's soul, here at the camp, his face writhed with death agony. Every time Adhavan forced it out, Balaraman’s soul experienced a great pain, it tormented his poor old wretched soul, when he finally uprooted it, Balaraman was literally killed multiple times, but he realized that he didn’t die, as in the previous experience, his soul didn’t leave his body, the divine lamp didn’t soar up to greater heights, rather, he felt a piercing pain, a stifling anguish, everything but the much awaited grateful death that which could have easily ended all his agonies. Balaraman opened his eyes, Adhavan came back running with his bounty, he placed the whole shrub with its big bulbs before Macham. Now Macham asked Balaraman,
“It is not dead yet, isn’t it? It still has life, can we kill it and eat, can you merge with it again and see what happens to you when I torment it once more?”
Balaraman was tormented by the question, he knew the pain he was going through, it was much more disgusting than the previous experience, he cried and he cried like a child.
Macham looked at him piercingly and said,
“What Balarama, you neither want us to eat the corpse that died in a spiritual bliss nor the living shrub that was uprooted painfully? What do you want us to eat then?”
Balaraman wasn’t able to answer Macham, he kept on sobbing continuously, as though Macham was unsatisfied by his tears, he poked him further,
“And now Balarama, can you tell who is impure now? Should Muthupandian go and a take a bath because he took your falling corpse on his lap? Or me who killed the rabbit? Or is it Adhavan who uprooted the plant alive, brought it to us, to feed us?”
Balaraman, cried aloud, shouted,
“Please Master, Please stop. Don’t do this to me? I will eat whatever that is given to me, Henceforth, I will not discriminate people based on their eating habits, because I don’t take meat, I will not consider myself as better than others who take meat. I will not make that mistake again. I will never again estimate a person based on their eating habits. I will not delude myself foolishly into believing that I am purer and greater than the meat eaters, just because they eat meat, neither will I talk about the physical purity again. I will not raise that question again. I will not discriminate people anymore on any basis. I have understood my mistake. I really apologize for my stupid standpoint.”
Then, sobbing he fell to his feet, Macham said,
“Get up Balarama, I did this to you, so that, during later stages, when I am not there, you don’t taint the solemn truth with your eating habits and physical purity concepts. Eating is very personal, so many factors go with it, from one’s habitat to one’s birth, it is very personal, we don’t have any rights to comment upon what one eats, neither could we discriminate humanity based on that, nor we could preach mankind, what they should eat, it is like telling a man that he should copulate with his woman only in this position, you see, it is all very personal stuff that one should not indulge upon. I have seen many disciples doing that, even though their Gurus weren’t so, they derive a sense of psychological supremacy over others by adhering to such norms, abiding by such misleading, delusive, concepts. You people should not fall trap to it. Again, I tell you, eating meat is a personal habit, self-realization has nothing to do with it, don’t let yourself indulge into taking sides, which either way, will not lead to self realization, they are just eating habits, nothing else.”
After a pause, Macham continued,
“The inherent nature of the ecology is to thrive on various species other than itself, flourish on it, reproduce as much as it could, uninhibited, paving way for its own species, its own line, to flourish on this vast expansive earth, fill the land with their offsprings that indeed holds good for even human beings, of course even for siddhars, who are in fact human beings. All species feed on its natural habitat, especially on those they get in abundance, and if you see it with clarity, a lioness would hunt just a deer for its family, even if it has potential to kill all the thousand deers that is wandering out there, well within its reach, but it is satisfied with a meager few, similarly, a goat doesn’t eat away all the pasture on the same day, an elephant doesn’t empty the whole pond, it takes in only what it wants, it lives on its rich habitat without dwindling it, that is ecological balance, a natural adaptation, living on what you get in abundance, it is purely based on the eating habits of the species, this has nothing do with leading a spiritual life or attaining salvation. To be more precise, lions live on deers, deers live on pastures, pastures live on manure, and so on, it is so simple, its ecological balance, it need not be complicated by the supremacy deriving, closer to god principles, as you have seen, that in truth, it has nothing to do with it. The ecological balance, neither preaches extinction of one species over another, nor independent living of all species together, it is the very nature of all species to survive, feed itself, reproduce, cling on to its clan, improve its defense, sustain its well being and thrive on the abundance. The whole line of feed is very sensitive, totally dependent on what is existing, right out there, if carnivorous beings are mutated to become herbivorous... in the worst scenario, what if homo sapiens, an omnivorous species, are cunningly transformed into herbivorous ones, by invoking the guilt filament, letting it burn in their minds, conceptually driving them to become unnatural, as though living on a feed-stock is equivalent to killing a live human being, letting the guilt linger on their minds, paving way to dominance within the same species, letting discrimination soar up, aiming to end the omnivorous nature of the species, what for? Will it all save the planet or will it kill the planet? What good will it do to the mankind? What good will it do the humanity? What good will it bestow upon mother nature? What good will it do to the ecology? It will not only create a ecological imbalance, it will also kill the amicable, harmonious peace, that exist now, among all living beings, together.”
Macham paused again, a deep silence fell over the gathering, he threw the dead rabbit and the shrub across to Muthupandian, said aloud,
“Cook for all of us.”
Saying that he walked towards the pond, had a refreshing bath, fished with his dhoti, came back naked with four dead fishes wrapped tight in his wet dhoti, after giving away the fishes to Muthupandian, he took his dhoti, squeezed it well, without washing it, wrapped it again around his narrow hips, then he sent away Adhavan to fetch a few large leaves to lay down the supper, later, relaxed, he studied the grill made by Muthupandian, the food was getting ready, it had a rabbit and four large roots, soon it will be loaded with the fishes he brought, smelling the food heartily, he laid back, let his mind drift away for a few moments, when he woke up, the hot, steaming, grilled, food items were placed right before him, neatly, on a few large leaves laced up together, it had, four fishes, four bulbs and one rabbit.
Macham sat in siddhasana, asked them to come close together, then he asked Muthupandian to offer the food to his divine mother Makali, that same moment, his body shuddered, it convulsed for 8 seconds, once it subsided, Macham raised his arms above his head, thanked his Guru, bowed to everyone, and said
“Eat.”
That day, when the moon was high in the skies, the foursome had fish, meat and roots. They feasted on it heartily, they savored every bit of it, Goddess Makali ate along with them through Muthupandian, so we could say five of them had supper that night, four males and one female, together, from the same leaf. It was the first time, Adhavan and Balaraman had meat and fish. After supper, they cleaned the spot together, washed their arms and legs, extinguished the burning torch, flocked around the camp fire, enjoyed much the warmth it gave off. Adhavan was the first one to doze off, soon, one after another they fell for it, slept along side one another, peacefully, covering well their bodies from head to toe, with their damp dhotis.
Macham and Balaraman were up, well before the sunrise, after attending to their morning needs, they bathed leisurely in the beautiful pond, while they were bathing, Macham asked Balaraman,
“Have you ever chanted in the waters, that too, in chandrakalai?”
Balaraman said,
“No.”
Macham replied,
“Then, you should try it today, stand firmly on your right leg, fold your left one, place the left heel on the inner sides of your right knee, chant your mantras, looking at the sun, of course, you can close your eyes, but remain in the same position until you are done with all your chantings.”
Balaraman bowed to him and said,
“Yes Master, let me try.”
Afterwards, Macham walked towards the shore, found a neat, cool place, sat there in padmasana facing the rising sun, focused on his breath intently, the next moment, he attained a samadhi and remained breathless, there, in the pond, Balaraman did as asked by Macham, soon, his mind reached the state of tranquility that he had never known before, he even saw the whorl, remained within it, for almost an hour, unaware of the pain in his legs. The sun was spreading its rays, though Adhavan was awake, he didn’t feel like even moving his arms a bit, whereas Muthupandian was busy like a bee, attending to his morning needs, when he came back after a bath, to his dismay, he still found Adhavan asleep, to Muthupandian, it is a humanly impossible task to sleep with the sun’s rays striking hard on ones face, he looked at Adhavan in astonishment, without disturbing him, he sat beside him, he relaxed, he didn’t force himself to be still, but slowly, a stillness crept upon him, his eyes took up that peculiar bulging, he continued to watch without thoughts, he just watched, he didn’t think, there wasn't any need to think, everything was in place. Adhavan was in a deep trance, as like Balaraman, he too was inside the whorl, but he never attended to his needs, neither did he pray, nor did he strain his muscles, but still, he was experiencing the same state Balaraman was experiencing. It just happens to him very naturally, it blossoms in him just like that, at any place, at any moment, at any time.
Balaraman was the first one to come out of the trance, slowly he came to the shore, eased his calf muscles and thighs, prostrated right before Macham, who still was in a samadhi, then, he came close and sat near, by the sleeping Adhavan, who too was resting within the whorl—the mother’s womb. Time just flew by, after two hours of morning samadhi, Macham slowly opened his eyes, tried to move his legs, finding it bit difficult, looked around for help, Muthupandian and Balaraman understanding his situation well, immediately rushed to his assistance, massaged his calf muscles and thighs, patiently, helped him to get up on his feet. Adhavan was still asleep, even after Macham was up. Macham looked at him intently, entered the whorl Adhavan was in, whispered,
“Come out.”
The next moment, to both Muthupandian and Balaraman’s surprise, Adhavan got up from his trance, tied his dhoti well around his narrow hips and was ready for the day, only then, Muthupandian and Balaraman understood his true state, even though Adhavan was lying around in the hot sun, pretending to be asleep, he still was deep within himself, deep inside the whorl, experiencing a state closer to samadhi.
As Adhavan approached them, Macham asked Muthupandian,
“Now can you take us to the second spot?”
With Muthupandian leading the front, the group walked in silence for another 2 hours, they were standing before a smoothly flowing stream. The vast expanse of the land was filled with the neem trees, wherever Macham turned around, he saw only neems, as he was keenly studying the landscape, Adhavan slowly left the group to attend to his morning needs. Macham wandered around the place for almost an hour, he tasted various soil, water, and air, studied the bed of the stream, even counted the number of hill peaks he could see, then he selected a spot, dug up a few feet to check the nature of the underground soil, fortunately, a spring gushed up, they drank from it, washed their arms and legs, then, they continued to wander about, exploring the wilderness. On seeing them busy, Adhavan stepped into the waters, leisurely enjoyed a relaxing bath in the gushing stream. Done with a thorough study, Macham looked out for Adhavan, he was still in the stream, with his hands raised well above his head, palms clasped in prayer, in adoration to the almighty, his body shone brightly in the hot sun, it glittered like gold. Right across where he was standing, a few feet from the spring they dug out, there was a big, a very big, gigantic neem tree, it looked odd for a neem tree to grow so huge, especially when the surrounding ones looked comparatively small. Macham thanked his guru, he selected the big one, turned around and looked out for Adhavan, he was still in the stream, enjoying the soft flow of the water immensely, Macham didn’t have a heart to disturb him, so he decided to wait for him under the shades of the chosen neem, a short distance from the stream, a few paces from the spring. Slowly, after having enough of time in the water, satisfied, Adhavan came out relaxed. Studying the landscape, he approached Macham, on the way, he drank few full palms of water from the freshly dug out spring, after that, he continued to walk towards Macham. There, under the shades of the neem tree, Macham was discussing with Muthupandian and Balaraman about the importance of a good landscape, Adhavan without interrupting their conversation, joined them in silence, Macham continued to talk,
“In another 3 hours of steady walk, beyond this neem forest, you would reach Pari Santhai, the third spot you are mentioning is somewhere there, at its border, but unfortunately, the water there, dries out in summers and the place will be heavily crowded during the market days, then, in search of water, you may need to walk all the distance back to the pond we bathed this morning, even the stream you see right out there dries up occasionally, especially during the hot days in the summer, but if you could dig a well, exactly at the spot where we found the spring today, this place will never run out of water. Socially, this place will become very important, as you know, it is very close to Pari Santhai, and when you people start inhabiting this place, others too will come down to make settlements. And if you cross the stream, walk straight for a day and a night, you will reach River Nayili, else you just could follow the stream, it will take you there, but it is a very dense forest, very rarely people trespass it, even the villagers beyond Nayili, neither tried to inhabit it nor made through it, in fact, if they want to come to Pari Santhai, they would need to take a roundabout route, for 5 days and 5 nights, but the straight way out is just 1 day and 1 night. Very few early aspirants, have explored those dense woods, and very few have come out alive, like Adhavan.”
Macham looked at Adhavan slantingly, held his gaze for a moment, then resumed,
“Before that, 2 centuries ago, a very old man, somehow crossed those dense forest alive, spent the rest of his life wandering around this neem forest carefree, he never looked further, since his vocation didn’t fall in line with ours, we Siddhars didn’t take him in, but we made sure, he lived till his last breath happily, without physical and mental infirmity, he lived most of his life in deep penance looking for God, but he never found it and he died looking for him, we buried him somewhere here and planted a banyan tree over his mortal remains.”
Macham closed his eyes, caressed his forehead, probed his mind deep and said,
“Oh, it is there, beyond the stream, in an hour’s walk, at the borders of the dense forest, his spirit guarded the borders, it acted like a fort, preventing people from trespassing this region, in those days, when siddhars walked these places, it played an important role in guarding the sanctity of the caves in the Vasimuni hills and the remote ones in the Venmudiyar hills.”
Adhavan realized that it is, his great-great-grandfather, whom Macham was talking about, soon Adhavan felt an innocent joy in his heart, he felt less burdened. Macham smiled at him and continued,
“So you know the importance of this place, the likeliness of it getting established into a much sought divine abode.”
Muthupandian hesitated for a moment, asked,
“Master, by building a temple here, will we not spoil the sanctity of this region.”
Macham laughed and replied,
“After Velir’s formed a close power circle among themselves, Vasimuni hills and Venmudiyar hills came under their strict control, they guarded it religiously, from then on, none of them dare crossed Pari Santhai, had guts to venture the deep forest out there without their permission, so are the laughing hills.”
He paused for a moment and continued,
“The great Siddhar Agastiyar is one of the most revered forefather of the Velirs, so from the olden days, Velirs respected siddhars, paid tribute to them, adored them, guarded them like precious jewels, more than their lives.”
Muthupandian asked,
“Then shouldn't we get the permission of the Velirs, if we are to stay here.”
Macham penetrated his soul, closed his eyes, after a short pause, replied, this time his voice reverberated across,
“Fear not, when I am here, this is the land given to me by the Velirs and I am giving it to you, as I have said before, you can bring your kins here. I can count 17 families that look up to you, those that really need you, those that will always be loyal to you, bring them here, let them toil this land under the graceful presence of the divine Goddess Makali. Though you have crossed 50, we will get you married soon, you will have kids, they will have many offsprings, your lineage will be strengthened to an extent it can’t be uprooted. Your people will flourish in this land. What else a man would need to make his life meaningful?”
Muthupandian was moved to tears, he said softly,
“Yes Master. Will meet them in their dreams, tonight. Will ask them to come over.”
Macham told him, pointing at Adhavan and Balaraman,
“Teach them both, how to do it... at leisure.”
Muthupandian replied, “Yes, Master. Will do.”
Then Macham said,
“Go find yourself food, eat and rest, in the evening, during sunset, I will request Goddess Makali to take this neem tree, from then onwards, it will become her divine abode. You don’t need to bring me food, help yourself with what Mother nature is ready to offer you. You can go now.”
Saying that, he sat in padmasana, focused on his breath, caught hold of it, attained samadhi. Adhavan, Balaraman and Muthupandian walked deep into the neem forest, they found nothing, but for few birds flying around, here and there, Adhavan sensing that they should not be looking out for food here, pulled Muthupandian by arms, said,
“Lets us fish, there are so many fishes in the stream, we will have enough for our lunch as well as for supper, so, can we take that time and wander a bit into the woods, find that Banyan tree, Siddhar Macham was talking about.”
Muthupandian realized that it was the first time Adhavan had talked to him, he smiled at him and said,
“Yes. Let us go and see it for ourselves”
Then they looked at Balaraman, he nodded in approval, all three turned around, moved towards the stream, crossed it without much effort. Muthupandian asked Adhavan and Balaraman to wait for a few minutes, squatted near a flat stone, placed the spear head over it, held it firmly with his left hand, using his right hand picked a small smooth pebble, rubbed it back and forth, smoothly, rhythmically, over the edges of the spearhead, every time he rubbed it over, sparks of fire shot out from it, finally, he ran his finger over the sharpness, satisfied, he stood up, stretched his back, nodded approvingly, then, together, they approached the dark woods. Adhavan led the pack, moved forward, without hesitation, in the direction pointed out by Macham. After an hour’s walk, centuries old banyan tree appeared in their sight, it was so incredibly big, massive and enormous, it in itself looked like a forest, widespread and expansive which could easily accommodate 1000 men, Adhavan on seeing the large bats, hanging upside down, ushered his comrades to remain quiet, thinking about his great-great-grandfather, he fondled gently one of its branches, a chillness surrounded him, he felt the presence of his spirit, it was a very emotional situation, his eyes watered, he felt very grateful, thanking him, he turned around to see Muthupandian and Balaraman, they were looking at him curiously, Adhavan was not interested in exposing his personal matters, so as to bring a shift in the mood, he asked them,
“Do you know how to make a brew out of these barks and fruits?”
Balaraman said,
“Yes, but we would need containers and filters, we could also concentrate it, into lethal dosages that would help us to go without food for days together, make our bodies strong and venomous.”
Muthupandian said,
“It simply means we can’t use it for the day’s needs, you know, I am really starving.”
Adhavan smiled at him,
“Let us wander around this place, see if we can find some edible fruits.”
They walked around the spot, finally found a grove of wild banana trees, whose berries were very short, in fact, shorter than one’s index finger, they weren’t fleshy too, but they smelled heavenly, the ripened yellow ones were being pestered by swarms of flies, chasing them away, Muthupandian, pulled a ripened one, peeled away the skin, ate the berry, his eyes shone, it must have tasted really good, he handpicked few more ripened ones, gave it to Balaraman and Adhavan, as they were relishing on it, Muthupandian started collecting a few more hands of good, ripened bananas. Once they have gathered enough, they decided to return, while they were returning with loads of bananas, Adhavan stopped for a moment, near the banyan tree, offered 6 ripened bananas for his ancestors, placed them below the center trunk, thanked them again from the bottom of his heart, then he joined his companions, walked along with them to the stream, it was around mid-noon, the journey was proving hectic and tiresome.
By the time the trio reached the stream, they have emptied half of what they have gathered, none of them were hungry anymore, they didn’t feel the need to fish, so they crossed the stream silently, walked towards the big neem tree, there, under its cool shades, Macham was still in samadhi, they moved to the other side of the banyan tree, so as not to disturb Macham, there, they cleaned a spot, placed the remaining hands of banana in heaps, sat around them and relaxed, slowly, unaware, their minds drifted into a deep sleep, born out of sheer tiredness. They must have overslept, around late evening, Macham woke up all the three, sent them away for a bath, took a few bananas for himself, savored it, while guarding the remaining. The trio returned soon, leaving them to their bananas, he went to the stream for a refreshing bath, he came back soon well before sunset, dried his body, stood staring at the big tree, exactly at the time of the sunset, he called out for all the three, resting on the other side of the tree, they grouped before him, he took the spear from Muthupandian, pulled him closer, took him by his hand, walked towards the trunk of the tree, Adhavan and Balaraman followed them, with his bare hands, he rubbed a spot in the middle part of the trunk, exactly at its center, then, chanting “ommmmm’, he gently caressed the spot, they were able to feel the presence of the Goddess Makali, the whole surrounding was charged, a turbulent wind raced across furiously, threatening to uproot all the neem trees in the forest, right at that moment, Macham slid his left thumb over the sharp edge of the spearhead, red, hot blood oozed out of the cut, he smeared the blood over the center spot of the trunk, formed a dark red circle, continuing to chant “ommmmm’ pressed his oozing thumb hard against the center, the next moment an extraordinary, supernatural force, entered the neem tree in the form of a pure, dazzling, brilliant, white, glowing light, everyone saw it with their wide open eyes, it was so bright, it blinded them all with its brilliance, they saw a miracle happening right before them, they saw the divine goddess enter the neem tree in the limelight, it was just incredible, the whole tree shook vigorously, and it took much longer for the spasms in Muthupandian’s body to subside, tears of joy rolled down heaven’s eyes, a soft drizzling drenched their souls, it all lasted for a few countable moments, then, a deep, impenetrable silence engulfed them, drained out of energy, Macham leaned over the neem tree, licking the blood in his wound, he spoke softly,
“This neem tree is now her abode, as a part of the transformation, from this moment onwards, it will keep shedding its leaves, in next 3 days, it will wither away all her leaves and will remain naked till the coming new moon day, that is when you will light the first lamp here, at its base, offer her water, fruits, flowers, milk and honey. Balaraman can chant mantras to elevate her mood. She will be much pleased, that night she will bless this land with a heavy downpour and it will continue to rain for a week, on the 7th day morning, you can see the first leaves sprout out of this barren tree, that is the sign from her, that she has accepted this land, your kins and the humble abode you have given to her. From then on, she will be ready to accept your daily offerings, attend to her devotees, bless them intimately, unbound. Then you can build walls around this place, build a hut around this tree, dig a well out there, raise a whole village right from here, no evil spirit can dare enter this land, no wicked soul can step pass her borders, she will guard this land and her people like her own children, she will be your guardian angel, serve her well, your people never starve a day.”
Unable to hold onto the ecstatic moments any further, Macham let out a moan, sat on the grounds, remained speechless for few moments, the trio flocked around him, waited patiently for him to come out of his spiritual ecstasy, then slowly gasping for breath, he gathered himself up, continued to talk in whispers, they listened carefully to everything he was saying,
“Build yourselves, each a hut, attend to her in complete reverence, she will bestow upon you more than what you would ever need in this life, of course, Adhavan couldn’t be part of it, he has other calls to attend, you both need to partake in building this temple, it should be built around this tree, it will remain the center of any erections you raise, but then, you should never fell this tree, and it will never again shed its leaves, you have seen her enter it, similarly, she will stretch and inhabit every single living creature in this place, it will all become her possession, her subjects, they will fulfill her commands, they will listen to her, they will be her face, she will act through them, she will guide the spirits that dwell here, she will rule like a queen a majestically till the next pralayam. You both will live a happy, spiritual, blissful life here.”
Macham remained silent for a moment, then continued,
“Again, I tell you, don’t fuss yourself with the offerings, you offer what you eat, in later stages, she will pull many people from many different places, then, it will very naturally evolve into a place where you may not be able to offer her meat, fish and eggs, as non meat eaters will also come to her, in thousands, with wide open arms, seeking her grace. They will look up to her, for her divine interventions, then when it happens, you need to make those offerings privately at your home, as I have told you before, you should not disrespect any man’s eating habits, if non meat eaters have started to flock here, then that is a sign for you to stop offering her meat in this place, which you can very well do at your home, give away the food to the likes who eat meat, there isn’t anything wrong about it. It will not only make her happy, in addition, she will be proud of you. But here within the temple, when both these types come and go, either you need to have separate altars or choose the way that will comfortably accommodate both. It will be a stain on her, if her place has two altars, she won’t wish that, so act in ways that will make her happy, not in ways that will make a particular sectarian happy, tolerance is a much needed virtue, when different kinds of people come together from different walks of life. You both, must have that tolerance, till your last breath, at all circumstances, without fail.”
After a long pause, Macham talked openly to the Goddess Makali,
“Bring peace, prosperity and joy to all those who come to you. Bless them all.”
The moment he said it, a tremor went through Muthupandian’s body, that again is a sign from her, that she has warmly accepted siddhar Macham’s request. The drizzling stopped. He then, asked Muthupandian to light a campfire, prepare for nights stay and supper. As the trio got busy with it, Macham leaned onto the trunk, closed his eyes, inhaled deeply, calmed down his breath, ordered his soul, to a far off place, where Nedunenkilli was struggling to make a decision, purely to help him out from the unavoidable fall, he would eventually land upon, but alas, he was a bit late, what had happened there gave him cold shudders.
(To be continued...)
Written on Dates: 09/03-09/08
Chapter 02 The First Glimpse of the Third Eye
Chapter 03 The Complete Surrender
Chapter 04 The Sacredness of the Divine Incarnation
Chapter 05 The Veneration of a Guru
Chapter 06 The Immortality
Chapter 07 The Art of Dying
Chapter 08 The Good Cause
Chapter 09 The First Dissemination
Chapter 10 The One behind the Spiritual Transformation
Chapter 11 The Smothering of the Class Distinctions
Chapter 11 The Smothering of the Class Distinctions
Chapter 12 The Insight of the Divine Lamp
Chapter 13 The Great Four
Chapter 13 The Great Four
Chapter 14 The Final Samadhi
Chapter 15 The Blossoming Love
Chapter 16 The Divine Intervention
Chapter 17 The Second Dissemination
Chapter 15 The Blossoming Love
Chapter 16 The Divine Intervention
Chapter 17 The Second Dissemination
Chapter 18 The Fusion and Beyond
Chapter 19 The Rise of an Internal Conflict
Chapter 20 The Realization of the Self
Chapter 19 The Rise of an Internal Conflict
Chapter 20 The Realization of the Self
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