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Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Adhavan (3): The First Glimpse of the Third Eye

Chapter 2: The First Glimpse of the Third Eye

What he sought after disappeared to present him with what has sought him.



Translation


Not the form; not the space; not the one that stands out exceeding another
Not the change; not the distance; not ‘this’; not ‘that’
Not the big; not the small; not the talking spirit
It’s the truth sprouting out very rarely—who the mighty, could have the insight?
—Siddhar Sivavakkiyar Song (072)

After encountering the first failure in walking the waters, Adhavan strolled back to the bank and decided to pack his things and set out for the journey of his life. One of the things that he considered important of all his possessions is the eight feet bamboo staff, which he decided to safely restore to its original hiding place. As he covered the staff with freshly cut leaves in the thick bushy undergrowth, he suspected if he would ever come back alive to regain it. The mystery that clouded the existence of aspirants who have never returned remained unanswered. The village headmen had never organized a rescue pack, as in almost all the cases the incidents were either in quest of exemplary adventures or those that were borne out of personal questsacts of self indulgence ignoring the warnings of village headmen.

He made himself a five feet simple staff that had natural curves at both the ends. He tied the sack to the smaller end and let the larger end free to hold. He looked around to see if he can get his hands on anything that would help him in the journey, to his surprise he found none. Then he knelt; bent down with both the hands; caressed the soil; smelt it; took handful of it; smeared it on his bosom. Turned swiftly around, heaved the staff on his right shoulder and started walking determinedly towards Nayili; stick resting on his shoulders and the sack dangling freely at the farther end.

He slightly dipped his right-palm into the river and sensed the speed of the flow, to add to the worries it has gained speed alarmingly, might be due to the previous nights down pour. Though his instincts warned him against crossing the river, he threw himself over Nayili and towed himself cautiously towards the opposite bank. When he neared the middle of the river the current grew much stronger than he expected, in a fractional moment it wobbled him; tore open his sack; flew him away as well his staff that he made painstakingly. Though he regained control, he wasn't confident enough to go after his sack and he knew he has lost his staff too. After putting up a dramatic survival fight against the flooding Nayili, somehow he managed to grab handful of reeds rooted deep in the soil at the edge of the opposite bank and yanked himself up. He fell flat on the ground grasping heavily for breath. He then awkwardly stooped with his hands on his knees, and earnestly looked out in vain for the most precious thing he ever had in his life—his Mother’s blanket. The loss of it was unbearable. Adding further to the day’s miseries the loss finally had its effect; it broke him down to pieces and shattered all his strength and courage. It painfully ravaged him and made him fragile. He threw himself on the ground; sobbed heavily; cried loud; beat his chest; pulled his hair with all his might; pushed his nail hard into his cheeks and tried to tear them down. His face started bleeding but his cries didn't subside. The outbreak turned to soft whimpers and slowly into a moan. And that was the moment; he had a second thought about the journey. He thought about returning home. At the same moment, there on the top of a mountain, Athri gave off a faint quizzical smile. What may, Adhavan decided to pursue his quest. It is going to be an arduous hectic journey and an implacable test of the character. Now that he has nothing physical to hold on, hence nothing to lose, he continued his journey with a single purpose one pointed determination.

He looked up the direction Athri disappeared as a flash of light in to the wilderness of the mountain. He has to go south east, hence decided to take left of the mud path that almost replicated the course of the river. He estimated five days of walk during the time of the Sun. He then planned to keep checking his shadow during sunrise to ensure that he is keeping to the directions, in addition to the visual identifications he has mentally land marked. When he was about to turn left he found a squirrel looking at him. It then ran straight past in to the bamboo stretch. To his surprise it turned back abruptly and looked straight into Adhavan’s eyes as though it expected him to follow it. The way it looked at him, the hop and jump with which it moved and the way it turned back swiftly, did intrigue Adhavan. Instinctively he followed the squirrel and tried to keep pace with him but to his aghast he lost the squirrel and found himself right before a massive Peepul tree. What he sought after disappeared to present him with what has sought him.

Although he has seen massive Peepul trees in his native village this one stood out for it’s built not for its size. It stood erect with its flexible supple branches, shading roughly fifty feet on all the sides. The rift in its trunk, is a feet from the ground tapered to closing at a feet down from the branching point. It resembled the third eye of Lord Siva placed well symmetrically in the center. He realized that this must be some sacred spot but to his awe the place was devoid of any religious personifications and mental inceptions rather it was abode of immaculate serenity and he sensed divinity in the air. Adhavan decided to spend that night under the tree and set forth for the journey in the early morning. He drew upon his guts and decided to peep through the cleavage. Very cautiously, he looked and found only darkness. He went cold and sweated when he heard the voice “If you want to see, then you light a lamp”. Adhavan turned around to saw a handsome smiling face. As he pulled out from the chink, smile turned into roaring laughter that must have touched the heavens. Birds flew away from the tree momentarily and every living creature in and around that place must have been mesmerized by the heavenly laugh and its reverberation. They were all dumbfounded.

His eyes were crystal clear they illuminated and shone bright by some deep inextinguishable light within him. His dark beard rested on his chest and his hair was let down loose on his shoulders. His nails were clipped trim. He was wearing a faded pale dhoti that had his lower half covered to his calf. He must have had the habit of rinsing his clothes but it seemed he had never really cared about washing off the dirt. He walked sure footed towards the turf, straight before the rift of the Peepul tree and sat on the ground in siddhasana, pulling the right leg much inwards to an extent his heels slid over the sides of his slim waist. Index finger of his left hand, was slowly caressing the bottom of the toe on the right foot, the tip of the middle finger was resting on the nail of the Index finger. His right arm rested on the thighs of the right leg; inwards of right palm were holding his chin light, knuckles of the index finger was right beneath the nostrils covering his fleshy lips. Placidity filled the electrically charged atmosphere; from roaring laughter, it just dropped to teeming quietude but for the back and forth swaying of the being. Adhavan slowly came to realization that this being that has showed up, has come to help him out. It watched him so intently without a blink and it actually started gobbling him with his eyes so it became very difficult for him to even stand straight before its eyes, leave alone walking to that being. It seems to measure his every movement, including breathing style, heartbeat and supposedly the stream of his thoughts too. He grew nervous and started sweating as he approached the being. His heart beat was growing faster and faster, and it was so audible that he could hear only his own beat. Back home, he has fought wolves and hyenas on his own to save his flock but they were just wild animals on contrary here, even nearing this living human being was so difficult, terrifying and tiresome. He mustered all his strength and took a step forward. To his perils, he was not able to withstand the force coming from the being; he fainted, fell backwards on his knees and lost his consciousness.

He woke up and found himself staring emptily at the full moon; a sense of fear entangled him with insecurity lurking in his heart. He has left his home and got strayed into the midst of the wilderness. He is nowhere. What has he come for? He looked around for the mystic man, he was still there but this time in padmasana; eyes closed; head tilted upwards; palms of both the hands closed inwardly at his Navel. He looked solemn like a King, majestically aloof, but immensely satiated with the thing that has absorbed his whole being completely into something wholesome that Adhavan has not seen or felt yet. He was now hypnotically pulled to him; this time the being didn't force him out rather it pulled him near and closer. How can the same man exhibit two different supernatural phenomena just in lapse of few hours?

Adhavan sat close beside him waiting for him to open his eyes and talk to him. To his frustration, time just flew by and he never opened his eyes. He realized that he didn't have any solid meal from yesterday night; except for one half-ripe mango he had today noon and plenty of fresh water to quench his thirst. No later he realized this; his stomach started twitching in hunger. Adding on to the starvation the moon showered coldness. Though he was having chills and hunger tweaks, he waited patiently. He squatted with arms closed inside. Whether the patience paid him or not his shivering and tweaking subsided, he felt a warmth spread inside him. He was warmer than he would feel during mid noon. Warmth was so comforting to the outside coldness. Like a fetus in a mother’s womb he shrunk himself before the being and dozed off. He entered into a state of very deep unperturbed sleep.

The first strokes of the Sun woke up Adhavan. It was a happy morning. Feeling the dew, he looked up and saw to his astonishment that the being was in the same position he saw yesterday night. Now this made Adhavan look up to him in reverence. He wandered around the place, carefully studying flora and fauna, as taught by his sister. There seems to be lots of medicinal plants and herbs that he has not seen back at his home but have heard in hearsay. They must be of high importance so he didn't tamper with any of them. He saw a wild rabbit hopping past him towards the carrot bushes. He ran along with the rabbits, thanking them, he plucked few carrots with their green tops, though he felt like savoring them right then and there, he wanted to present the carrots to the being, before he can have his share at leisure, but wondered if those types of human beings would ever need food for their day-to-day living. On the way back to the Peepul tree, he found a small pond covered by lilies, the sight of the water made him so happy. He kept the carrots aside half immersed in the water by the shore. Right at the moment he leaped to dive, the being rose from the pond he placed both the palms together in front of his chest bowed his heads to Adhavan. Then he looked at the Sun and lifted his palms together above his head and kept staring at the sun for few moments. Then again he dipped into the water, this time he removed his dhoti rinsed it in the water and squeezed it hard. He placed the shriveled dhoti on his left shoulder, took a palm full of water in the right hand; sipped it all; gargled it multiple times from deep down the throat; spitted it out in one fluid motion. He repeated this twice. Turned around graciously and walked out naked in a very slow pace as though he never had any intention to leave the pond and the Sun. On the shore he waived his dhoti in rhythm, and threw it straight into the air. It stretched and flew a feet above him giving shade to him and he walked very casually in its shade to the Peepul tree; the dhoti followed him by floating in mid-air immediately above him.

Awestruck by the incident, Adhavan washed himself fast; picked up the carrots and moved towards the Peepul tree. On his way back, he plucked few lilies along with its stem for the being and hoped it might like them. The being now dressed itself up with his half dried dhoti. He knotted it this time in a langotri fashion that covered lower half of his body till his knees. He turned back to see Adhavan approaching him, he went inside the cleavage in the Peepul tree, took two pure bright cotton dhotis, came out and gave them to Adhavan.

In turn, Adhavan bowed in gratitude, placed the carrot and lilies at his feet. With big smiles bowed and received the dhotis in all his humbleness. The being took the carrots and lilies, found himself a place near the sides of the Peepul tree, stretched his legs and leaned back on the tree, facing the Sun. The moment the being sat down, rabbits shot themselves up from all directions, single pointedly to the being. He then fed all those wild rabbits with the carrots brought to him by Adhavan. He spared one for Adhavan, and handed over that to him. Adhavan sat beside him broke that one carrot and gave one piece to the being. The being smiled light, took the carrot munched and chewed it for minutes together. All during this time his eyes were closed and completely engrossed in the activity of eating. He then slowly opened his eyes it was just a slit. For some unknown reasons he didn't open his eyes fully wide and it looked as though he was completely drunk with barrels of liquor. From yesterday evening till today morning they were together but they didn't exchange even a single word. To break this very comfortable silence and harmony Adhavan broke it by asking “I came to see Athri” only then he realized Athri is the name he gave for the being he saw in the river bank. To his surprise, without slight hesitation he said “I am one of the disciples of one of Athri’s grand disciples. I am being called as ‘Macham’ by all of those holy masters as they found me among shoaling fishes near this pond”. He pointed his finger to the pond they took bath today. Then he said in a deep resonating voice. “You can find Athri over there...” He pointed his index finger exactly to the spot Adhavan has land marked. This he wasn't able to group it under sheer coincidence.

Now the silence engulfed again but this time it was uncomfortable. To pull back the veil, Macham asked Adhavan,

“Why did you leave your home”?

“I wanted to find God and for that I am looking for Athri to seek his help”

To that Macham replied slowly,

“I know Athri, but I don’t know what or who God is? Do you know who God is? Have you actually seen him?”

 The question hammered a red hot nail straight into Adhavan’s heart, after a momentary silence he said, “God is present everywhere. He is omnipresent. He created all that we see and he is formless but being frank, I have not seen him yet”

Macham then questioned incessantly,

“You have not seen him at all, then how do you say, God is present everywhere?”

“If you have not seen him, how can you say that he created all that you see? Of course what about things that you didn't see? Was it not created by God then?”

“On the first hand, you have neither seen him nor felt him, how do you say that he is formless? If he is so as per your statement, even if you find him, alas! you will never be able to see him, as he is formless, then your formidable journey is in vain. It is not too late, you can change your mind and go back home.”

“If the formlessness you are talking about is a concept then God is purely an inception for you. Any conceptual inception has a mental form though they don’t need to have physical form all the times, then the God you are talking about has a form conceptually, though not physically, hence you can’t say it’s formless. ‘Thought’ as such is an example. It is physically formless but mentally has a form that is formless.”

“It’s equivalent to having a god personified as an idol right before you and then saying that God is formless.”

“Even though there isn't much difference between physical representation and conceptual inception, latter is a tricky trap to come out of, since you will not know what you are trying to come out of, even if you see and feel the God, as per your earlier inception, your mind will trick you out saying 'God is formless'.”

Secondly, either it’s physical or conceptual does it actually fit the real God, else you are praying to some other thing that is not real but an imagery, irrespective of it being either physical representation or conceptual inception.”

“Is this real God that is being talked about is based on your own perceptions borne out of real time experiences or has it been forced down your throat by ages long scriptures and belief systems?”

“Do you adore the God created and manifested by the scriptures or God borne from your unique perceptions derived form your unique experiences?”

Adhavan was at the verge of tears, he hesitantly replied, “No! No! God is very well there it is just we can’t see him”

Macham pretended to be aggressive and replied,

How dare you say ‘We’?”

“What made you think that I have not seen God? May be I have not seen the God you are talking about but I have seen my God?"

Macham roared an heavenly laugh and continued,

“First of all, I stopped using this word God almost some 375 years before, but for such genuine discourses. Even stopped these prosaic conversations on God, no God, big God, small God, form God, formless God, distant God, near God, good God, bad God, my God, your God etc. as they are just palavers."

Adhavan’s jaws dropped, he was not able to argue back, strategically he has been beaten, and all these days what he has been doing to others was done to him by Macham. His thought pattern has been peeled off, all the layers and constraints were diligently removed by a well experienced hand. In literal terms, Macham has taken him forcefully; ripped away his mental barriers; raped his mind to his satisfaction and let him down in shreds. He being greater than 375 years is just one another add-on to the prodigy.

Adhavan’s mind was cleared of all his thoughts and it was now ripe for infusion, this no mind state was what Macham was exactly looking for, he took advantage of this state. He took Adhavan by his neck and blew on his forehead thrice. On the third blow, Adhavan saw a green light in concentric circles encompassing bluish light in the center which then, slowly got transformed into a bright white. Macham rested him slowly on the ground and watched over him like an Hawk.
(To be continued...)

Written on Dates: 02/07/2015; 02/08/2015; 02/09/2015; 02/10/2015
About Adhavan,Chapter 1

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